It was like Fear Factor, but a little worse

You know how on Fear Factor the premise was supposed to be that people faced the "worst fears"? i.e., heights, spiders, snakes, water, whatever? Well if I were on that show I could handle just about anything as long as it didn't involve vomit. I really and truly have an aversion to vomit. Now I know that most people don't like vomit and some actually can just plow through when they have to deal with it. But when I see or hear someone vomiting, I too, become physically ill. Don't be jealous - but I usually end up throwing up, too...

So last night, poor little one's cough comes back...with a vengance. I don't know how much more "sick" I can take this winter. We have been pretty faithful with the saline, decongestant and now antihistamine, but I guess this cough is bigger than all of that. It's pretty bad - to the point that he's back to gagging on the mucous. Sad and scary, no? So last night I feed him some cobbled together dinner - applesauce and cheerios. We go upstairs and have a bath and bottle before bed. During bath time I gave him decongestant and then antihistamine. After bath we did the normal bottle feeding and he seemed unusually hungry. He finished the last of the formula on the changing table and I sat him up to zip his sleep sack and all he** broke loose. It was like in Stand By Me - the pie eating contest scene. The vomit came out in what I can only call and firehose like projection. My first instinct was to stick my hand out to catch the liquid version of he** and catch it I did. All the formula and applesauce mixture one could ever hope for. Do all people have that instinct? Is that something I've been lucky enough to develop over the years - as I get older and smarter my instincts are honed razor sharp so that when I see and hear someone throwing up I reach out to catch it? It's not like the handful I caught saved the day - it didn't make a difference to the situation and wasn't helpful, but my instinct told me that I should do it. Going to have to give that some more thought...

It was never ending. Filled up the sleep sack, my hand and went down the front of the pajamas. Todd ran to the bathroom to get a washcloth, etc and left me alone. Per my normal reaction I started gagging and gagging and gagging. TC thought I was being funny and started laughing. That was NOT okay :-).

Fast forward to 2:00 am Todd rolled over and said "Do you hear that coughing? What do you want to do?" After an unnecessarily lengthy discussion it was decided that I would get up, give medicine and perhaps a bottle to get him back to sleep. I walked in and he's standing in the crib and is happy to see me. I got the meds and the bottle and repeated the situation from earlier. All was going well until he finished the 5 oz and I called to Todd to please fix more. He fixed 4 more oz and TC sucked it down. He seemed fine and I put him over my shoulder to take him back to bed and I heard it again - that rumble that will haunt me forever. The rumble that now signals FIRE IN THE HOLE! This time Todd reaches out to "catch" the vomit and ends up with a handful. So as it turns out Todd got that instinct too! And once again - it made not a bit of difference. It didn't save me or the floor AND with two handfuls of vomit, Todd was left figuring out what the heck to do with it - and once he did - he then had to figure out how to get the trash can lid open without spilling it. I laughed and again, that was NOT okay :-)

I got super lucky this time and ended up with it down my left arm, inside my robe and down my legs. Walking to the 3:00 am shower all I could hear was "SHHHHLPPP, SHHHHLPPP, SHHHHLPPP, SHHHHLPPP" and if you don't know - that's the sound your feet make when they are sticky with vomit in your Croc flip flops...

All the commotion woke Tiki and so at 3:30 am I found myself back in bed, with wet hair, something that passed for pajamas, Todd and Tiki and half a dozen stuffed animals with the montior glued to my ear. And then...what seemed like maybe a hour later...the alarm went off.

Repeat after me "Children are a blessing from the Lord, Children are a blessing from the Lord, Children are a blessing from the Lord..."

TTFN