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It was just a plug...
Todd originally thought it was a plug, but wasn't about to dig around in there. All those glass balls hovering over concrete floors...it was bad enough with the little one. I'm still vacuuming up glass from the rug.I'm not totally happy about it. I was hoping it was catastrophic so that I could talk Todd in to a new white tree for next year.Nope.Oh well.
This is so gross I shouldn't even post it, but then I wouldn't be being true to the purpose of this blog, right?
I have gotten notorious for not bringing my diaper bag into stores during routine errands. I take it to the mall and such, but grocery, Target, Walgreens, no. Too much hassle. Lately, though, I have been questioning this strategy. The little one poops like 7 times per day - not even joking - and it's not scheduled. It's totally random. I'm ALWAYS caught without diapers and thus have to buy diapers and wipes in EVERY store so I can run to the bathroom and change him in order to finish shopping. WHAT-EVER. Will I learn?
Maybe one day, yes, but not yesterday.
We were taking a spin through Toys R Us and the boys were playing on the ride ons and I smelled it.
So, like I always do, I walked over behind Bitty and pulled his pants away just a bit to see if I was right...
I was...and it was steaming. Bleh.P.S. Todd is still so confused as to why I come home with new diapers every single day and my mom and grandmother think I'm an idiot... ;-)
It's just that I'm spending all of my free time trying to make lemonade from this bucket of lemons I just got handed.
Be back in the saddle soon.
and I hope I wake up soon." Saith Tiki last night.Sunday evening I was cooking him some bacon the old fashioned way (stove top frying). Before the pan warmed up he came over and peeked over the edge to see and sniff. Then he went back to the den to wait for it to cook. I turned away from the stove to put something in the sink and I hear "OWWWWWW - that grease popped!!!!! I need some ice!". So I grab a damp paper towel and wrap some ice cubes in it and send him away again - not even looking at his face. After dinner he was on the water slide and came over to say something and I noticed a HUGE white smiley patch where there was no skin under his nose. Evidently he put his nose on the edge of the frying pan to peek at the bacon and it burned his little nose. YOWCH! So we aloed it up good last night and today it's all scabbed over. Poor baby. So then yesterday evening after dinner we decide to take a little drive (I know gas prices, but we went in the neighborhood). I had a new pack of Positively Pom gum and Teeks wanted to try it. I gave him a piece and the rest of the drive went something like this...AHHHH the gum has my fingers trapped!TK put that gum back in your mouth, pleaseOk.Yikes, the gum has leaped on to my ear!TK, I'm serious. If I catch you with that gum out again, it's curtains for you.Yes ma'am.Mommy, look what the gum did now!I turned around to see the gum stretched from his mouth to his forehead and from cheek to cheek. I had Todd pull the car over, but it was too late. By the time I got around the vehicle, the bangs (which were shaggy anyway) had landed on the gum and were stuck there - smelling like pom and creating some sort of bizarre pink widow's peak - like a chunk of hair pasted to his forehead. I couldn't help but laugh... I told Teeks to leave it alone and that we'd have to cut it out when we got home. He sat there quietly for a few minutes and then we heard..."This is like a dream and I hope I wake up soon. First I burn my nose on the bacon pan and then I get this gum stuck in my hair. I hope I wake up from this dream soon."Poor Teeks...
If you leave your pantry open and turn your back...the baby will know and will get there before you will... 
A couple of years ago my parents got TK some GI Joe dolls. We thought they would be good toys for him (they were huge) and a good way to practice snaps, dressing and undressing - typical learning stuff. My mom even asked "Will Todd be okay with dolls that can be undressed". I was all "Todd is modern, he will be fine with that" and such. And for the most part, he was...until for the fourth week in a row he found the 2 GI Joe dolls completely naked save for their dog tags around their neck...That day he renamed them "Don't Ask" and "Don't Tell" and informed us that if they didn't find their clothes quickly they would be dishonorably discharged...Alas, they did not find their clothes and ended up in the dumpster...naked and alone. End of story. I still do give Todd a hard time about Don't Ask and Don't Tell and he now just grimaces and makes some mumbly comment about letting TK play wth naked dolls, etc.So this morning Teeks comes in the office carrying Derek, Prince Derek that is from Barbie and the 12 Dancing Princesses - the boy doll he HAD to have because he had riding boots...naked."Mommy, I can't find Prince Derek's clothes""Hmmm, yeah, he's naked all right. We need to find some clothes for him pretty quick""Well, I can't. I don't know where they are. So can I keep him?""What?""Can I keep him? Naked?""Only until your father finds out..."At least Derek's not naked with a friend and at least he's not wearing dog tags...
That I was gone for 7 days from my boys?My flight left Friday, May 16 at 12:30 pm for Orlando and I returned to DFW on Friday, May 23 at 7:30 pm after a small weather delay.That was honestly the longest 7 days of my life. To make matters worse I was at the Disney Contemporary on the 12th floor (Concierge Level) with an unobstructed view of Cinderella's Castle, Space Mountain and the nightly fireworks - things my little guys would have enjoyed immensely. This is same hotel I was in for my February meeting - when I had TK and my mom with me. That definitely made it much harder to be there alone this time. There's something nice about being a mom and escaping for a few hours, but 7 days is a litle much...I'm thrilled to be back to my mundane, loud, dirty, crazy life!!!!!!!!!
And other high stakes drama from the world of daycare going kids...
I hope that my blog is not *that* famous yet because I don't want my neighbors to read it. (haha)
But seriously, the little one goes to a daycare owned by a lady down the street - an in-home daycare. So Friday afternoon I go to pick him up and she says "I think TC has pink eye." I was thinking "Information that would have been useful 5 HOURS AGO!". It's 5:30 Friday afternoon.
He wakes up Saturday pretty okay and we are thinking "Allergies - let's just watch and see how it goes". By Saturday night it is clear that it's not allergies and it is indeed pink eye. So we all suffer through Sunday and hit the doctor first thing Monday morning.
On our way back from the dr and $90 later his daycare provider calls "How is TC? Is he coming today?" I said no - maybe in 24 hours.
Fast forward to this morning and he's looking much better, but we are still not ready to go back to daycare. I get another call
"Is TC coming today?"
"No he's doing better but I think we will wait until Wed morning"
"Oh, did you go to the Dr? What did he have?"
"Pink eye"
"Is that all?"
"Uh, yes. Why"
"Well I'm sick and so is another child and we're trying to figure out what TC gave us"
Ba-whu?
"What do you have?"
"I think I have bronchitis"
"Well, TC has pink eye and that's not bronchitis. Isn't bronchitis a secondary infection from a cold?"
"I don't know. Talk to you later"
Huh. For maybe the first time ever, I was speechless.
Nervous laughter follows. That's what TK said to me line @ Walgreens...during this conversation.We walked up to pay for our purchases (deeply discounted Easter candy :-)). There was a younger, handsome guy working the register and an older handsome gentleman paying for his purchases. About the time we got to the counter Tiki lets a belch loose that I didn't think was possible from a 5 year old belly. It was wet and noisy and disgusting! Out of habit I said "Teeeeks - yuck- say excuse me". The two guys at the counter were looking away trying not to laugh and I was doing the same. A few seconds later he said "Excuse me." And then "But mommy you do it all the time."Touche.
I have never joined in the "Oh Monday - I hate Monday's, etc" crowd. Monday is just another day of the week for me. Yes, perhaps a little more stressful and unorganized in the mornings because there's more to go in the car than the rest of the days of the week. But really - it's just Monday. Today you might find me humming a different tune...
Our day started at 7:00 am. Early, you say? On a Saturday, yes, but on a weekday when the alarm went off at 5:24 am...no sir.
Got up, got ready, got the kids ready and everyone left the house. On the way to preschool Tiki starts complaining that when he's taken in first it's not fair because TC gets to "spend more time with me". A valid complaint if you consider facing backwards with no ability to communicate "spending time together"...
Drop off went just fine. I get back in the car and head up the hill to TC's daycare. On the way down aforementioned hill, there is a motorcycle cop. He got me. Not only did he get me but after he pulled from the tricky spot, we caught a red light. So I had to sit there at the red light, both of us knowing that it was me. I did not like that prolonged agony! He was nice - and I keep saying that - like you wouldn't be nice if you were making your quota. He gave me some blah, blah, blah, fatalities on this road, blah, blah, blah, really cracking down, blah, blah, blah, tell your friends. So while he's doing the actual writing of the ticket I hear a wretching sound coming from the backseat. I leap out and the cop is like "What are you doing lady? Get back in your car! Ma'am get back in your vehicle". I opened the back door and there's TC smiling bright, covered with vomit. I know you have to be asking the same thing I am - WTH - why is your child always vomiting? Well, this time friends, I have an answer. Evidently the little cardboard boxes for Orbit gum are NOT good teething toys as someone else in my house thought and cardboard chunks fall into that ubiquitous "choker" category for babies zero to evelentyhundred months old. The cop felt no pity and gave me the ticket anyway, adding "You seem like you are in a hurry so I'll do my best to get you out of here quickly..." Ba wha?
I then realize that I'm not sure what possible changes of clothes my daycare provider might have for TC so I have to go BACK home and get another change of clothes for TC. Time on the clock 9:00 am - still in my town...
It is then that I realize I have a 9:00 am conference call. I don't have the number in front of me so there is not much I can do except wait until they call me. And when they did I just opened the phone and said "No speaka English" and hung up. It's not like I could have participated with all that going on.
I finally get to work about 9:45 am. The day is flying by until around 1:30 when I get a call that says "You don't happen to have my bank card do you?" Daaaannnng. Is this for real? Todd is at work with no lunch and no money. So I drive down to his work and buy us a sandwich.
I finally leave work around 5:15 pm - RACE to the daycare to avoid the late fees, get both kids, scream home with visions of 6:30 pm bath and bed for them and a drink for me...
But what actually happened was Tiki and friends in our sandbox until 7:30 pm. Bath for TK and PBJ around 8:00 pm and finally kids to bed.
And that whole time...
It was raining.
You know how on Fear Factor the premise was supposed to be that people faced the "worst fears"? i.e., heights, spiders, snakes, water, whatever? Well if I were on that show I could handle just about anything as long as it didn't involve vomit. I really and truly have an aversion to vomit. Now I know that most people don't like vomit and some actually can just plow through when they have to deal with it. But when I see or hear someone vomiting, I too, become physically ill. Don't be jealous - but I usually end up throwing up, too...
So last night, poor little one's cough comes back...with a vengance. I don't know how much more "sick" I can take this winter. We have been pretty faithful with the saline, decongestant and now antihistamine, but I guess this cough is bigger than all of that. It's pretty bad - to the point that he's back to gagging on the mucous. Sad and scary, no? So last night I feed him some cobbled together dinner - applesauce and cheerios. We go upstairs and have a bath and bottle before bed. During bath time I gave him decongestant and then antihistamine. After bath we did the normal bottle feeding and he seemed unusually hungry. He finished the last of the formula on the changing table and I sat him up to zip his sleep sack and all he** broke loose. It was like in Stand By Me - the pie eating contest scene. The vomit came out in what I can only call and firehose like projection. My first instinct was to stick my hand out to catch the liquid version of he** and catch it I did. All the formula and applesauce mixture one could ever hope for. Do all people have that instinct? Is that something I've been lucky enough to develop over the years - as I get older and smarter my instincts are honed razor sharp so that when I see and hear someone throwing up I reach out to catch it? It's not like the handful I caught saved the day - it didn't make a difference to the situation and wasn't helpful, but my instinct told me that I should do it. Going to have to give that some more thought... It was never ending. Filled up the sleep sack, my hand and went down the front of the pajamas. Todd ran to the bathroom to get a washcloth, etc and left me alone. Per my normal reaction I started gagging and gagging and gagging. TC thought I was being funny and started laughing. That was NOT okay :-).Fast forward to 2:00 am Todd rolled over and said "Do you hear that coughing? What do you want to do?" After an unnecessarily lengthy discussion it was decided that I would get up, give medicine and perhaps a bottle to get him back to sleep. I walked in and he's standing in the crib and is happy to see me. I got the meds and the bottle and repeated the situation from earlier. All was going well until he finished the 5 oz and I called to Todd to please fix more. He fixed 4 more oz and TC sucked it down. He seemed fine and I put him over my shoulder to take him back to bed and I heard it again - that rumble that will haunt me forever. The rumble that now signals FIRE IN THE HOLE! This time Todd reaches out to "catch" the vomit and ends up with a handful. So as it turns out Todd got that instinct too! And once again - it made not a bit of difference. It didn't save me or the floor AND with two handfuls of vomit, Todd was left figuring out what the heck to do with it - and once he did - he then had to figure out how to get the trash can lid open without spilling it. I laughed and again, that was NOT okay :-)I got super lucky this time and ended up with it down my left arm, inside my robe and down my legs. Walking to the 3:00 am shower all I could hear was "SHHHHLPPP, SHHHHLPPP, SHHHHLPPP, SHHHHLPPP" and if you don't know - that's the sound your feet make when they are sticky with vomit in your Croc flip flops...All the commotion woke Tiki and so at 3:30 am I found myself back in bed, with wet hair, something that passed for pajamas, Todd and Tiki and half a dozen stuffed animals with the montior glued to my ear. And then...what seemed like maybe a hour later...the alarm went off. Repeat after me "Children are a blessing from the Lord, Children are a blessing from the Lord, Children are a blessing from the Lord..."TTFN
The Seer of Seers, Prognosticator of all Prognosticators, I curse you and whatever family you live with in the ground. I can't take another minute of the colds and sickness that accompany winter. I really thought that this time having a spring baby would be ideal so that by winter time their little lungs would be better developed and ready to handle the season of germs, but it hasn't worked out that way and the the groundhog comes along with 6 more weeks of winter. Thanks Phil. No really.What is it about the colder weather that makes colds so prevalent? I might have read that it's just more people inside a warm environment ripe with germs that makes them seem more prevalent, but I wouldn't remember where I read that. I sincerely hope that once everyone is healed this time around that we can just move on. I'm getting tired of all the complaining coming from me.
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